A man's got to know his own limitations.
D. Harry
A man's got to know his own limitations.
D. Harry
A Sight for Sore
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Howdy to all of our cybre
pards out thar. We shur do hope that ya will find the time ta come and set a
spell once in awhile. If ya have a hankering ta burn a little powder with us,
please saddle yer horse and come on over ta our spread. We be a shootin at the
Monroe Chester Sportsman Club in Monroe, New York. If'n ya be in need of our help or need directions
just click here.
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Belle Fourche , Pride of the Prairie (dogs)
The name of our western town that we
have adopted for our fantasy is Belle Fourche in the Dakota Territories, circa
1870. We have a newspaper called The Boot Hill Epitaph that is run by a local
feller by the handle of Catskill Bob that also serves as chief editor, reporter,
printer and photographer. He's also our proctologist and deals with the pain in
the butts when needed. We have a saloon and fancy house run by Sassy Cyn, that
also serves as the meeting place for the town council and court where Judge
Zaney Gray presides. He is the best judge money can buy and a bit strange in the
head fer sure. The town has a law, land and mining claim office that is run by a
cowpoke named Frontier Justice. His rates are fair but he has never won a case
and never filed any deeds or claims we know of. Our spirtucal needs are looked
after by a preacher who goes by the handle of Chai Justice that has been known
to be a bit of a philanderer and card shark and a school marm by the name of
Mizz Sugar who also serves as the town librarian We are patched up and attended
by our lady doctor Doc Losum whose bite is worse than her bark. We have a top
notch blacksmith and carpenter that takes care of our horses and houses however
he has a problem with the drinking and is our official town drunk. He lives at
the town dump but sleeps most times in the street. The town Sheriff is Colonel
Bill and he maintains law and order when he can. For some unknown reason he
sleeps in one of the jail cells or in front of his office with his hat covering
his face. The problem is that our dubious Sheriff fancies himself as a great
gambler but to date the only good hands he can get are the one that are hand
cuffed. Just outside of town is our own cattle baron the infamous Calico Kid.
For years he has been trying to improve his stature by buying up all the
property and businesses in Belle Fourche but to no avail as no matter how much
land he buys up he still remains short a few inches in height and brains. The
town undertaker and restaurant owner is Lead Poison and his bride Sassy Naney.
We have townies and cowpokes, gamblers and ladies of the night. All of us good
folk what resides in our little town of Belle Fourche add to its wealth and
promise. We are all proud to call ourselves good and honest folk that help keep
the peace and assure that we remain safe, healthy and whole. We are indeed the
Boot Hill Regulators, one and all.
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Important Information:
Important Information:
All shooters must be registered and
assigned to a posse before shooting.
All shooters must be present for the safety meeting
NO EXCEPTION.
All
MCSC & SASS safety rules and procedures will be followed.
Please dress western at our shoots, we
ask that you not wear baseball caps, tee shirts, or sneakers.
No jacketed or semi jacketed ammunition
is permitted. Lead bullets only.
The Monroe Chester Sportsmen Club, The Boot Hill Regulators, as well as the originators of this web page hereby disclaim any and all responsibility for any information, items or articles contained in the "Trading Post" never having examined the items or determined their feasability or fitness for any particular purpose. Any representations contained in any advertising placed in the "Trading Post" for articles or services to be sold through the "Trading Post" should be evaluated by the person interested in such services directly for their truthfulness and authenticity. The "Trading Post" is a convenience offered by the above organizations and individuals and members thereof. The appearance of any articles for sale, rent, etc or services offered in the "Trading Post" does not mean that the organizations set forth above or the individuals responsible for this web site recommend the purchase or use of said articles or services.
| ITEM | CONTACT | ||
|---|---|---|---|
|
(845) 753 2198 http://www.davissport.com/ | ||
Visit By Mule
If you want you can send a telegraph to the Boot Hill Regulators or if you like you can send a regular letter. Please print it on soft paper.
Directions to Monroe Chester
Sportsman Club-Palisades Interstate Parkway to Exit 18(Rt. 6 West-Long Mountain
Parkway) to Central Valley 10 miles. Take Route 6 & 17 West
(Goshen-Middletown) to Exit 130 Monroe, at the end of ramp at light make a left
onto 208 South. At the V in the road bear to the right (208 sign & State
Police) at light make a left onto Rout 17M East -go 5/10ths of a mile to the 2nd
light then make a right turn onto Lake Road. (Greenwood Lake) go 3 more miles
and make a right turn onto Laroe Road. Follow 1 more mile and make a left turn
onto Gibson Hill Road (Hospital Sign) go the last 1 mile and watch for the
Clubhouse on the right.
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Scheduled 2004 Shoots
Western Period or Classic Cowboy Dress
Is Required
SASS
Rules Will Apply
No
Jacketed Or Semi-Jacketed Ammunition Is Allowed.
You may shoot one or two Pistols in Modern,
Traditional, Frontier, Duelist as separate categories.
Gunfighter is two-handed
ONLY.
Monroechester Blackpowder Shoot !
The
Monroe-Chester
Sportsman Club will be hosting a muzzle loading “kitchen” shoot on
$7.00
Registration fee. $1.00 per target. $1.00 re-entry fee. All events fired in 20
minute relays. Famous cooked lunch and cold non alcoholic beverages available
from
Route
17 (Quickway) West to
| Boot Hill Epitaph - EXTRA!!
Published by the Boot Hill Regulators Monroe Chester Sportsmen Club, Inc. P.O. Box 624, Monroe, NY 10950 |
FROM THE
PUBLISHER
Does the reader remember sometime
back Catskill Bob was a chili cook off judge ? Well his fame spread across the
plains and the new territories.
Recently Catsskill Bob was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off because no one else wanted to do it. Also the original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. Catskill was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides they told him that he could have free beer during the tasting, so he accepted this as being one of those burdens you endure when you're an Internet writer and therefore known and adored by all. I report this event as a cowboy sevice to all that might want to hire my pard as a judge in the future. Here are the scorecards from the event:
Chili # 1: Snake Oils's Fang Tooth Gila Monster Chili
JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
CATSKILL BOB: Holy smokes, what is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway with it. Took me two beers to put the flames out. Hope that's the worst one. These people are crazy.
Chili # 2: Malpaso's Afterburner Long Winded Chili
JUDGE ONE: Smoky (barbecue?) with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
CATSKILL BOB: Keep this out of reach of children! I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. Shoved my way to the front of the beer line. The barmaid looks like a professional wrestler after a bad night. She was so irritated over my gagging sounds that the snake tattoo under her eye started to twitch. She has arms like Popeye and a face like Winston Churchill. I will NOT pick a fight with her.
Chili # 3: Doc Hollandaise's Famous Canadian Burn Down the Barn Chili
JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.
JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers.
CATSKILL BOB: This has got to be a joke. Call the EPA, I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been sneezing Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now and got out of my way so I could make it to the beer wagon. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. She said her friends call her "Sally." Probably behind her back they call her "Forklift."
Chili # 4: Dorado Slim's Black Magic Diet Chili
JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: A hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
CATSKILL BOB: I felt something scraping across my tongue but was unable to taste it. Sally was standing behind me with fresh refills so I wouldn't have to dash over to see her. When she winked at me her snake sort of coiled and uncoiled -- it's kinda cute.
Chili # 5: Calamity Nan's Legal Lip And Hair Remover
JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
CATSKILL BOB: My ears are ringing and I can no longer focus my eyes. I belched and four people in front of me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed hurt when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. Sort of irritates me that one of the other judges asked me to stop screaming.
Chili # 6: Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety ("Catskill's Better Half", ifin he has a better half?)
JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers.
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
CATSKILL BOB: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous flames. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except Sally. I asked if she wants to go dancing later.
Chili # 7: Slippery Slim's Screaming Sensation Two Hour Out House Chili
JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef threw in canned chili peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about Judge Number 3, he appears to be in a bit of distress.
CATSKILL BOB: You could put a hand grenade in my mouth and pull the pin and I wouldn't feel it. I've lost the sight in one eye and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My clothes are covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth at some point. Good, at autopsy they'll know what killed me. Go Sally, save yourself before it's too late. Tell our children I'm sorry I was not there to conceive them. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful and I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air I'll just let it in through the hole in my stomach. Call the X-Files people and tell them I've found a super nova on my tongue. from now on the milky way will be called Catskill Bob just space gas!!!!!!
Will report any and all new chili
cookoff results as the CDC sends out alerts.
FROM THE
PUBLISHER
There are a few other
items I want to cover, now that I got your attention.
In the first issue of the Epitaph I
indicated we would include a classified section if you folks wanted one. So far
I haven't heard from anyone. Let me know if you have anything you want to sell
(pistol, rifle, knife, leather, horse, etc.), of if you are looking for anything
in particular to buy. This will be a good forum to do it.
Also, we're looking for articles from Boot Hill Regulators to publish in the Epitaph. Lead Poison has sent me one that will be published in the next Epitaph, and I have a few from the Cowboy Action Shooting Internet posse (cas-list). Technical articles, opinions, historical vignettes and othershort anecdotes about the West, Cowboys or anything else that has to do with our sport is welcome
Well, Pards, I'll close fer now. Thanks to all of you for coming to the June 1 shoot, and we'll see you at the next one on Sept. 14.
Catskill Bob
SASS #5306
* * * *
We wish to gratefully acknowledge the
participation of the following sponsors:
Hunters Supply, Inc. http://www.hunters-supply.com/
PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT
The Boot Hill Epitaph is published by
The Boot Hill Regulators in affiliation with the Monroe Chester Sportsmens Club,
Inc.
Contact
mark@icu.com
If you're Over/underwhelmed to write to
me stomp yer mouse
here
no big words
please
We want to thank Mizz Sugar for all her help in korrecting the grammer and spellling .
This page was prepared under the
misdirection of Dick
B AKA DD!
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